The chef's blog

Aussie rules

An amazing thing happened to me last week. I crossed into a parallel universe, another dimension. A strange and mysterious place I’ve not encountered since the 90’s. The 1990’s I hasten to ad.

I clearly remember (or do I?) places and times when on presenting concepts to a client, they said things like ‘no’, ‘nice try, but…’, ‘you’re joking right?, and ‘that one there – now go do’!

They did this without a). inviting half the entire employee base to comment, b). pre-supposing – well anything, c). worrying if a woman in Skemalsdale and all those who obviously live, breathe, think and doubtless crap like her will take the nark at the liberal and unjustified use of purple, on a Tuesday, whilst whistling. d). or reference to Stakeholders.

What in God’s name are stakeholders?

Van Helsing was a stakeholder. Ogbog the Dog, Commander of the first battalion of Boadicea’s rag tag, arrow fodder army was doubtless a stakeholder. George Foreman invented one. In the old days, someone on the receiving end of a haymaker in the eye was a candidate ‘steakholder’. Stakeholders! Impediments in the way of getting marketing people to make the calls they should be making.

There are some Brits in this, yes, financial services company. But also plenty of Australians! The positive attitude and retentive free zone view on life of our cousins from over there has obviously rubbed off.

In a world so lacking in ‘bull horn grabbers’, this lot knew exactly what they liked - when they saw it. They’re not as ‘famous’ as those on their turf. They can’t outspend those on their manor. They can’t outmuscle them. They can’t out-noise them.  So by God, they took the ballsiest route. One which just might get them known for something!

HIP HIP.